Sage Life Chapter Memo #1
(with a photo for your viewing pleasure from Tanglewood with my sis, bro-in law and beau enjoying life on July 4th:)
I had, yet again, a hard time thinking about the future of this country today...... So I figured I’d share some positive personal growth- my first Sage Life Chapter Memo.
I was trying to find a name for this new chapter of my life as I so loved naming my “interlude of pleasure and self restoration”. I’m now working at Project SAGE and I’m in my 50’s perhaps this is the Sage chapter of my life:) I’m going with it for now….
I’ve worked for 18 days now as Executive Director of Project SAGE. I’m pleased to say that I’m loving it. I’m so lucky and glad I had the Interlude from WAM prior to beginning this new job. It made all the difference to starting with fresh energy.
I am learning so much and realizing how much I already know. I learned SO MUCH at WAM about running a non profit and building relationships. Every day I’m grateful for all I learned at WAM. I apply it every single day. Yes- I’m learning new systems, software, vocabulary and people, but my greatest learning curve is the client services work. It’s a new vocabulary and a new world but I’m loving it. Yesterday I took a big personal step by taking my first hotline call. It led to our advocates organizing to take a new client into our shelter. Wow.
What’s bringing me the most wonder and awe beyond that aspect of the work is connected to the vast difference between the life of a full time artist vs the life of a person with a full time job that nourishes their values.
As someone who was a full time artist who now is a person with a full time job that nourishes my values here are some of the mind blowing discoveries I’m reflecting on:
I don’t work in the evenings or the weekends.
I don’t think about work in the evenings or the weekends.
The hours I do work go by quickly but they are not urgent.
I have time during my work day to take a short walk, lay on the grass, have lunch.
My brain is beginning to have an incredible amount of space for things other than work.
I am beginning to have the physical energy to do things outside of work that are not related to work- this is new for me.
My spirit is so happy with me - she has so much time to think and wonder, which makes her giddy with joy.
I am beginning to have the funds to do things outside of work.
I’m paying off my credit card so quickly.
I will actually be able to save money for emergencies and retirement.
Many of my co-workers have only known this kind of job in their life - the kind that provides a stable income, important benefits, reasonable work hours and balanced expectations. And also feels good because it aligns with their passions and values. This is normal to them. That continues to blow my mind.
I’m also realizing that the way I approached my life as artist was also a strategy to keep my weight down. The constant adrenaline that burned calories. The late night work that prevented snacking. The quick pace of the day that kept me moving fast. Now, my nervous system isn’t working so hard, I’m not working at night and the pace of my day is reasonable. That, plus being a woman in perimenopause, means the weight is creeping up…which, in this society, comes with its own set of psychological baggage. I heard Dan Harris say on a 10% Happier Podcast that he’s now ‘Slower, Fatter, Wiser’ and that felt apt for me at this point in my life also:)
I am thinking so, so much about what artists go through to have a life as an artist. For me, while the joy of being an artist is unparalleled, the continual suffering, on so many levels, is immense. I gained so much by being a full time artist. I also, with full consent, gave up so much by being a full time artist.
But, ultimately, being an artist isn't a choice. Being an artist is who I am.
I’ve done a lot of work around owning that I can be an abundant artist in my 50’s. For a long time, I had a vision of what that was going to look like.
Now, it is beginning to look different.
I am an artist. I am cultivating abundance.
Therefore, I am an abundant artist.
Onwards.
If you've made it this far, have a great day, friends. There's much to be depressed about these days, so here's to finding the pockets of joy and hope along the way.....
